Ah yes it ends now.. the choice: drugs...... or me...
she chose :drugs
lovely
try to take care of yourself..don't rot away..
and i shall be there to help her when she tries to quit,yet again...
one day she will
...at least i believe so...
i always will...

Why??Why the fuck do I even bother anymore?It doesnt help,I'm pretty much useless to them all.I'm too stubborn to give up,and have too much pride to....well whatever.. my heart is breaking slowly but surely..and this time I will remain silent..that way its easier for both of us,but shes caught up in a feeling so maybe..just so its easier for me..ill be selfish for once and keep it all to myself....

Really need to submit more drawings....*rests head on desk* forgot yet again*sighs* anyway...umm.... Happy New Year to everyone,wonder what everyone did.I hung out with my ma (not that any of you care) and uhh...we drank rum and watched one of the greatest of all time,Rocky Horror Picture Show *YAY!*....I called Caitlin last night too,she seemed to be having fun,though she practically begged me to come see her(and her friend wanted to meet me).I would have too,if i wasn't having such a good time with my mom.For once...we didn't fight.... it might have just been the rum,but whatever,it was a good night(though i would have liked to see Caitlin)..oh yeah and if Zagiri happens to be reading this happy new year to you too you butt head*acts immature* muahahaaha

It slowed down,but for only aminute,time caught up,as everythign went at the speed of light it seemed.As i walked away from her house,frozen and my cigarette was soaked with snow,but i was smiling(for once).And now i sit,at my moms(mom happens to be passed out on the couch),no way of getting home tonight,sitting on the computer...ah what an odd day

If only she had stayed longer to explain....thats whats running through my mind.The party was nuts at my friend Amanda's apartment,its a two bed room apartment and there must have been over 30 people there. She got a noise ocmplaint so about an hour before i left everyone was shushing everyone else.Met some dude named Andrew... he asked for my number i think...so i told him to talk to Amanda about it.but the whole point of me typing this out is...well..my "ex" best friend... or whatever you wanan call her... i think ill just stick to steph. call her whatever you want.She just started doing stuff with this chick we both know.. and well the history between her and i...well lets just say theres history...anyway.... she said it was a repricussion.....she didnt stay to explain..so i gathered my things and left.. to see if i could catch her..her and a bunch of other friends were just sitting on a corner..im guessing they were figuring out where everyone was going.So i asked to talk to her,or maybe she just wlaked over and i asked.. and the moment she starts explaining someone interupts and well i have no idea what she meant by what went on tonight...but w/e...she probably wouldnt have said naything...at least nothing she actually thought...not sayign she was gonna lie,but anyway.. its all very confusing and i dont exactly know why im typing this out... guess i need it off my mind..